Sometimes, I think it’s all about perspective….

About a year ago, I picked up Martha Peace’s book, Damsels in Distress: Biblical Solutions for Problems Women Face.  And, I recently revisited it with my accountability group.

In her characteristic straightforward style, Martha Peace deals with several common problems and temptations that women face: Gossip, Idolatrous Emotional Attachments, Manipulation, Hurt Feelings, Vanity, PMS, Legalism, Feminism, The Role of Women in the Church, and Trials.  These can be difficult, and often emotionally-charged, issues to tackle.  In a culture – and this includes the church – that often makes excuses for, and, even defends sinful behavior, I appreciated Peace’s direct approach that calls sin what it is – sin.  She does not make excuses, but instead, as the subtitle suggests, offers biblical solutions and genuine hope for change.

You may not personally struggle with each and every issue covered in this book.  But, if you are not currently struggling with one (or more) of the issues addressed in this book, the chances are good that you may know someone who is.  And, as believers, we are called to bear one another’s burdens.  This book will serve as a practical reference as we deal with our own struggles and sinful tendencies, and also as as we seek to minister to one another. 

Although each chapter has much to offer, I will only point out two that I found particularly helpful:

Are You Sure PMS is Real?
I do not struggle with PMS in the same way that some women do.  But, I so appreciated the way Peace dealt with this issue.  Because this has never been much of an issue for me, I have a tendency to assume that most women use that time of the month as an excuse for their sinful behavior.  I have also heard others, specifically within the biblical counseling community (and this includes both men and women), claim that it is not real.  But, in this chapter (ch. 7), Peace offers both medical (the physical sympoms) and biblical (the sinful responses) evidence that point to PMS as a real issue for many women.  However, she is also careful to add,

“as real as it is, it cannot prevent us from honoring God and loving others during that time.” (pg. 105)

She then goes on to outline a biblical plan of action for dealing with the struggles and temptations presented during that time of the month.  This chapter helped me to understand the physical and emotional difficulties that some women face each month.  It also gave me greater insight as to how I can help them deal with those struggles in a biblical, Christ-honoring way.  (I actually thought that the explanation and solutions offered in this chapter were so good, I made my husband read it!)

Be Thankful? You Can’t Be Serious? (Trials)
As Christians, we all walk through trials.  We are all tested.  And, at one time or another, we have probably all asked “Why?”  I know I have.  For that reason, I also found the chapter on dealing with trials (ch. 11) to be especially helpful. 

Peace starts out this way,

“The ‘Why?’ question is common as people grapple with trials.  Although it is possible to have an innocent motive in asking the ‘Why?’ question, most people ask ‘Why?’ because they are upset with God.  Some conclude that there must not be a God.  Others believe there is a God, but He must be powerless to prevent trials.  Still others preach and teach that we have to come to the place where we forgive God.

All of these conclusions have one thing in common – they are blasphemous.  They malign God’s character by accusing Him of not being good.” (pg. 161)

Whatever the test or trail may look like, this chapter serves as a wonderful reminder that God has a purpose in testing us.  Although it may not be pleasant, and we may not ever understand the why, ultimately, we must remember that it is for our good.  And, I for one needed Peace’s gentle, but direct, reminder that, “He will do whatever it takes for you to give Him glory.” (pg. 164)

Although, and maybe because I greatly enjoyed, and profited from reading this book the first time, I was excited to share it with the ladies in my accountability group.  Discussing the topics addressed, and the study questions at the end of each chapter, with other women helped me to understand just how real some of these struggles are.  While we may not all struggle with the same temptations in the same way, we all struggle with sin. 

As Peace points out in the first chapter,

“Just because I had become a Christian did not mean that I did not have problems.  I still do, as a matter of fact!  It was an incredible relief and joy, however, to discover that God had provided resources to help me.” (pg. 25) 

This book is one of those resources!  Each chapter is filled with biblical reminders, warnings, encouragement, and hope.  I also found her charts (figures) to be an especially helpful visual aid, as she summarized sinful behaviors, and lined it up in stark contrast with what Scripture calls us to do instead.  This book begins, and ends, with the encouragement that, “there is always a biblical solution.”  

Jason and I arrived home late last night…or early this morning, depending on how you look at it, and which time zone you are currently operating in! After a 3-hour flight delay (due partly to weather, and partly to “mechanical problems”), we arrived at LAX, via El Paso (El Paso?! Who stops in El Paso?!), around 11:30, and made it home just after midnight. :)

Today, we are all trying to get back into the routine of everyday life.  Jason is back at work.  And, I am trying to conquer moutains of laundry, sort through some 65 e-mails (most of which, surprisingly, are not junk!), and catch up on my blog reading (there were 100 posts in my google reader!).  But, mostly, I am just enjoying being home with Hannah! I missed that girl!!  Jason and I have both been away from her for a few days, just never at the same time.  But, according to my mom, she did just fine, and, judging from the fact that she has now been sleeping for over 2 hours, I think she had a great time!  Now, if I could just figure out how to squeeze in a 2-hour nap…  

Blogging has become a bit sparse this last month.  There has been a lot going on, and most of it has been some form of preparation for this weekend.  Jason and I are on our way to Texas for 5 days (2 of those are travel)!  And, yes, we are leaving the little one behind here in California…and I already miss her terribly!  But, I keep telling myself that she will be having so much fun with friends, Auntie Jo, and Grandma and Grandpa that she probably won’t even notice that we are gone! If you think about, please be praying for us this weekend…I won’t share the details now (because I really should be sleeping!), but, maybe when we get back I will be able to share the specifics. 

I hope I’ll at least be back to blogging with a little more regularity!

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Let My Words Be Few
by: Matt Redman

You are God in heaven
And here am I on earth,
So I’ll let my words be few-
Jesus I am so in love with You.

And I’ll stand in awe of You,
Yes I’ll stand in awe of You,
And I’ll let my words be few-
Jesus I am so in love with You.

The simplest of all love songs
I want to bring to You,
So I’ll let my words be few-
Jesus I am so in love with You.

Likely this will only show up if you read this blog using some sort of reader (bloglines, igoogle).  If not, you may never see it.  That’s okay.  This is an old post that I found it while clearing out some “drafts”…And, I realized that I had never posted it!  So, better late than never.

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As I mentioned yesterday, Jason has been at the Resolved Converence for the past several days.  And, yes, I am quite jealous!!

So, that means that Hannah and I have been on our own since Friday.  5 days…I know, I know, it’s only 5 days, but it has been a long 5 days!  Although we have had lots of fun together (3 is such a fun age!!), we definitely miss our daddy/husband, and are very ready for him to come home!  When I think about my friends, whose husbands are police officers, firemen, or are often required to be away from home for several days at a time, I feel like such a wimp!  Because, really, when I compare it to what so many other families deal with, and endure as a regular part of their everyday lives – military deployments, business trips, and, sadly, even divorce – 5 days is nothing! 

But, Jason does not have a job that requires him to travel – and, because I am afraid of the dark that is something that I am very, very thankful for!!  So, for us, 5 days is a big deal!  These last few days have given me a new sympathy for those who do this on a regular basis, and hopefully a little insight on how to pray for them!  But, it has also given me a new appreciation for my husband.  We need him!!  Hannah just loves her daddy.  (So do I!)  And, although we know he is having a wonderful time (we are too), we are definitely looking forward to his returning home tomorrow!

Lest I sound like too much of a complainer, Hannah and I have been having a great time together!  I love my daughter, and she is just so much fun!!  There have been a few difficult moments, but, thankfully, the emphasis is on the word few.  We have played several rounds of Candy Land, Hi-Ho Cherry-O, and Chutes and Ladders.  Most of which I have lost.  I think we have read every book she owns – multiple times.  We have played dolls, built castles, and colored pictures…  And, she has been a great help as I have cleaned up the dishes, vacuumed the floor, or made the bed. 

We have also tried to do something “special” each day.  Nothing too big, or even exciting really (well, maybe to a 3-year-old), just some ways to break up the long days without daddy…  On Friday night, we went to the mall with Grandma and Auntie Jo, and saw the puppies and got a balloon!  On Saturday I had to run a few errands, so we started with lunch at “Mix Donald’s.”  That is not something we do too often, so it is a special treat for Hannah.  Then after her bath on Saturday night, I let her stay up late, so that I could pain her nails (fingers and toes)…with polish that changes color in the sun!  After the nail polish dried, we sat on the front porch for a while to see if they would change colors.  (They didn’t.  The sun was going down, and there were just too many shadows!)  Yesterday, she got to spend some time at Grandma’s house.  They fed the birds, and had a “tea party.”  Today, we might go to the park…  But, mostly we will just stick around here, and straighten up the house for daddy’s return tomorrow!!