Spring Reading Thing 2009

Posted by Veronica on Mar 21st, 2009
2009
Mar 21

I have seen posts about, and links to Katrina’s Spring Reading Thing in the past, but I’m usually a little too late to join in the fun.  Although I did not realize that spring was upon us (with the way the newscasters here are super excited about the first 90-degree day of the year – you’d think we were well on our way to summer, not spring!), I am glad to have stumbled on a link to this year’s reading challenge this morning!  And, in plenty of time to add my list to the others!        

Spring Reading Thing

 

 

Books to be completed:  
Technically, I don’t know if I can really count these as part of this challenge, seeing as how I have already started them.  But, I would certainly like to finish them before the end (June 20th).  I don’t think that’s cheating…  And, truthfully, I haven’t gotten very far on most of them! 

 

 

  • Lord I Want To Know You, by Kay Arthur
  • Passionate Housewives Desperate for God, by Jennie Chancey and Stacy McDonald
  • Family Religion, by Matthew Henry   
  • The Bible & The Closet, by Thomas Watson and Samuel Lee
  • Family Driven Faith, by Voddie Baucham, Jr.   
  • One with a Shepherd, by Mary Somerville 

 

 

Books to be Read:  

  • Becoming a Woman of Spiritual Passion, by Donna Morley
  • Girl Talk: Mother-Daughter Conversations on Biblical Womanhood, by Carolyn Mahaney & Nicole Whitacre
  • The Quest for Meekness and Quietness of Spirit, by Matthew Henry
  • Leading Women Who Wound: Strategies for an Effective Ministry, by Sue Edwards & Kelley Mathews
  • The Christian’s Daily Walk, by Henry Scudder (This is a re-read from several years ago.)
  • Recovering Biblical Manhood & Womanhood, by John Piper & Wayne Grudem

 

Books I do not (yet!) own, but still plan to/want to read:

  • Unfashionable: Making a Difference in the World by Being Different by Tullian Tchividjian
  • Adopted for Life: The Priority of Adoption in Christian Families and Churches by Russell Moore
  • Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover How God Can Make Your Marriage Glorious, by Debi Pearl
  • Spectacular Sins, by John Piper (which, by the way, is on sale for $5, through Sunday, at Desiring God.)

 

Books I do not own, do not want to own, and, really, do not even want to read:    

  • The Shack, by William P. Young – The truth is, I have no desire to read this book (and if you are wondering why, you can look here, here, or here).  However, I know several people who have both read it, and loved it.  So, part of me also feels like I should read it in order to offer a more personal argument/opinion.  We’ll see what happens… 

 

Books to read with Hannah:
Ever since my mom read them to me, I have looked forward to the day that I could read the Little House on the Prairie books, and The Chronicles of Narnia series to my own children.  And, while we both love Dr. Seuss, I think her attention span and active imagination will allow us to enjoy some longer non-illustrated (for the most part) stories.  I am so glad that Hannah enjoys books, and although she is becoming quite the little reader herself (she can read the first 3 “Bob Books” on her own!!), I still want to maintain the practice of reading aloud.    

  • Little House in the Big Woods, by Laura Ingalls Wilder
  • The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe, by CS Lewis
  • Charlotte’s Web, by E.B White
  • The Velveteen Rabbit, by Margery Williams  

_______________ 

There you go…My ridiculous over-ambitious list of books to be read prior to June 20th.  I’ll try and update my progress as I go, and hopefully include a few reviews along the way.  Leave a comment if you are participating this year…I’d love to see what you are reading too!

Crazy Sovereign Grace Music and Book Sale!

Posted by Veronica on Jan 31st, 2009
2009
Jan 31

Who doesn’t love a great deal?  I’ve been on a bit of a bargain-hunt ever since we moved here…For everything from grocery coupons, to gas prices, to clothing!  And it has paid off!  (No pun intended.)

 

Just last week, I found a (cashmere) sweater that was originally priced at $80 for $10.  Then, yesterday, I found a pair of capris – originally priced at $26, for – get this – $2.50!!  (And, yes, I did find several things for Jason and Hannah too!)

 

Not too bad, huh?

 

But, this… This just might be my favorite kind of deal…good books and good music!! :D

 

Bob Kauflin, over at Worship Matters, says this:

We’re doing it again. Having a ridiculous sale, that is.

 

Last year, during the month of February, we reduced the prices of our CDs and books. The response was overwhelming. So we decided to repeat the lunacy. Here’s the deal:

 

From February 1–28, at the Sovereign Grace store, you’ll find these prices:

  • Sovereign Grace books (23 of them, including Worship Matters, Worldliness, and Living the Cross Centered Life): $7 each
  • all CDs produced by Sovereign Grace Music (including Together for the Gospel Live, Psalms, Come Weary Saints, Awesome God, In a Little While, and Valley of Vision): $6 each

 

But wait…there’s more!

 

During February, we’re offering our normal free shipping in the continental US (library rate). But on all international orders we’re offering a discount of 50% on USPS First Class International shipping.

 

Why are we doing this? Well, we figure that most of us have been affected by the present economic crisis. We want to do whatever we can to make it easier for people to benefit from what we produce. We want to serve churches and individuals by providing biblically informed, gospel-centered resources at a low cost. And we’d really like to give it all away, but for now, that’s not financially feasible…

 

So we offer the February sale. Enjoy.

 

And feel free to tell your friends.

 

So, that is just what I am doing.  Jason and I are still benefitting from, and enjoying our finds from last year’s sale.  And, this year, I want my friends to get in on the deal too! :)  

 

Happy shopping my friends!!

Currently Reading: Nourishing Traditions

Posted by Veronica on Oct 13th, 2008
2008
Oct 13

Nourishing Traditions

For quite some time, Jason and I have both been interested in incorporating healthier foods and overall eating habits into our lives.  I have heard great things about this book from several people, so I finally picked it up this weekend.  And, I cannot put it down.  Not just because it is interesting reading (which it is!).  The real reason I can’t put it down, is because whenever I do, Jason steals it from me! ;)

Definitely very interesting and extremely informative…  So much so, I have been having flashbacks to high school chemistry with all of the talk of hydrogen atoms, chemical bonds, and fatty acid chains!  But, I – we! - are both learning alot, and looking forward to implementing the suggestions, and trying out some of the recipes. 

The only downside?  I am now terrified of my kitchen cabinets! :-|

2008
Sep 26

Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America, by Jeff PollardIt is no secret that modesty is one of my “pet” issues – my proverbial soapbox.  And, it will probably come as no surprise that a book on that topic has been on my Amazon wish list for months.  But, I was only recently able to get my hands on it!  Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America, by Jeff Pollard, is a small book (the author often refers to it as an article), and could be a very quick read.  However, there is a lot of thought-provoking information contained in just 74 pages!  So, I took a little extra time as I read, because I wanted to really think through some of the ideas and challenges to modern thinking presented in this little book.

Even within the church, controversy and confusion surrounds the issue of Christian (biblical) modesty.  And, though some will judge this book to be far too conservative, or legalistic, others will say that it is too liberal, and does not go far enough.  It is the stated purpose of this book, not to add to the confusion, or to stir up controversy, but to provoke fellow believers (men and women alike) to “love and good works” (Heb. 10:24) in this area.

Pollard begins by carefully defining Christian modesty in this way:

“Christian modesty is the inner self-government, rooted in a proper understanding of one’s self before God, which outwardly displays itself in humility and purity from a genuine love for Jesus Christ, rather than in self-glorification or self-advertisement.  Christian modesty then will not publicly expose itself in sinful nakedness.” (pg. 22)

The first few chapters deal specifically with the history of clothing, and modesty in general.  Pointing to God as the “Originator and Designer of clothing” (pg. 23), he looks to several biblical examples which, he says indicate “the purpose and function of clothing and the approximate area of the body that clothes were designed to cover.” (pg. 23)  He uses these examples (ranging from the good nakedness of man at creation, to the need for covering man’s shame after the fall, to priestly garments, to the clothing that Christ himself wore on earth, to the robes of those already in Heaven) to illustrate that while Scripture may not offer a black-and-white command in regards to style of dress, “It appears then that the Bible does offer us a standard for covering the body….The Old and New Testaments reveal that God’s earthly and heavenly people wore garments that covered them from at least the neck-to-below the knee.” (pg. 28)

Using this principle (of covering the body from the neck-to-below the knee) as a guide, the rest of the book deals specifically with the evolution of modern swimwear, and how it is connected to our changing perceptions of modesty and immodesty.

“Exposing the male or female body, which should be covered, is out of harmony with the Biblical model.  Moreover, since exposing the privates is shameful, it seems obvious that clothing which emphasizes or purposely draws attention to these areas of the body is likewise shameful and immodest.  And modern swimwear is the epitome of these things – by design.” (pg. 34)

He carefully chronicles, using mainly secular sources, how swimwear fashions have changed throughout recent decades.  Through his descriptions, he easily points out how, with each new season, swimsuits have become increasingly more revealing.  “The metamorphosis of the bathing suit forced our society to reassess its views of modesty.” (pg. 42)

Throughout the book, Pollard challenges areas that most Christians (pastors, teachers, and lay-people alike) view as “Christian liberty” or “a thing indifferent.” (pg. 47)  And, he asks his readers to honestly assess and consider the dichotomy we have created in which “people who sit in church on Sunday decrying public immorality, while remaining unaware that the garment they will wear to the next retreat would have landed them in jail for nakedness a few decades ago!” (pg. 47)

First on his list of “Christian liberties,” beach trips, water parks, and backyard swim parties – all common, and seemingly “innocent” summertime destinations for church youth groups around the country.  But, he points out that 60 years ago, a woman wearing what is now considered by many (within the church, especially) to be a “modest” one-piece bathing suit would have been arrested for indecent exposure. (pg. 47)  Yet, many pastors, youth workers, and parents promote, and even encourage these activities in the name of evangelism or spiritual encoragement.  But, Pollard poses a question that should be given careful thought and consideration:

“Given that modern swimsuits were designed to promote public nakedness and remain the most revealing form of clothing, why do so many Christians wear them in mixed company and encourage their young people to do so?” (pg. 45) 

He also addresses another area often classified under “Christian liberty” – the media, specifically television and movies.  “The media’s impact in selling nakedness to the American public is difficult to exaggerate.  Although the printed page once exerted considerable power of men’s minds, cinema and television dramatically eclipsed it.” (pg. 57)  Hollywood is certainly not neutral.  It wields great influence in the way people think about fashion, style, and has long been a factor in the “sex sells” mentality.

While most lay the burden of responsibility for modesty on the woman, Pollard boldly makes the following statement (forgive the long quote, but I think it makes the point quite clearly), 

“Guilt for this decaying and debauched state must not be laid entirely at the feet of women, as it often is.  The problem lies squarely wit the men in the pulpits and homes of this nation.  With the near dissolution of Christian manhood in this century, American males have become feminized sex-worshipers who do not lead, but are led.  They have followed their silver-screen icons into nudity, and not the purity of Jesus Christ.  Had they followed the God of holiness and governed their hearts and eyes as instructed by God’s Word, the present lascivious culture simply would not and could not exist.” (pg. 59)

Men are responsible before God for controlling their eyes, and guarding their hearts, and minds.  While the blame may not lay exclusively with the women, they are also responsible before God for their actions.  Women need to carefully examine their heart and their motives in their dress.  Though a particular mode of dress is not explicitly commanded, Scripture does contain clear principles for the purpose and function of clothing. And, as believers, we need to remember that it is not legalism to call brothers and sisters to obedience to God’s Word.

“Nevertheless, any who dare to speak against public nakedness are quickly decried as legalists, Pharisees, and – worst of all – fundamentalistsHow pathetic that so many pulpits and youth groups today are governed by the desires of the women and children of the congregation, and not the Word of God.” (pg. 59, emphasis mine)

Whether or not you agree with the content of this little book is between you and God.  But, it will challenge your perceptions of Christian liberties and modern-day modesty.  The tone of the book is an honest and direct look at the state of modesty, not only in our nation, but also our Christian churches and families.  But, it is also a humble, passionate plea from the author for believers to return to a biblical way of thinking in the area of dress.  I would highly recommend it to anyone (man or woman) seeking to develop biblical convictions on modesty.

Book Review: Do Hard Things

Posted by Veronica on Aug 22nd, 2008
2008
Aug 22

I tend to have high standards and high expectations – both for myself and for those around me.  And, I have been told that my standards are too high, and my expectations are unreasonable.  Maybe they are.  Or, maybe society’s expectations are too low

Do Hard Things 2.jpgWhen I first heard about Alex and Brett Harris’ book Do Hard Things, I was intrigued.  But, I put off reading it because I assumed that it did not apply to me.  I am no longer a teenager, and we are still a good 10 years away from parenting one.  But, on Kelly’s recommendation, I moved it to the top of my “to-be-read” list.  (And, soon after that, my sweet husband searched every bookstore in town, and surprised me with a copy “just because.”)

Throughout the book, I was surprised at the insight and wisdom that these two authors had.  And, I had to keep reminding myself that they were “just teenagers.”  Just teenagers?  Even as I thought it, I realized that I had just proved their point.  I did not expect two teenage boys to be capable of writing a book – let alone a good one!  (It should not be surprising though.  The Lord has truly blessed their family with an exeptional gift in this area!  They are the sons of Greg and Sono Harris, and the younger brothers of pastor and author Josh Harris.)  While I do not know them personally, in their writing they certainly exemplify 1 Timothy 4:12, “Let no one despise you for your youth, but set the believers an example in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith, in purity.”

Do Hard Things calls teenagers to rethink how they are using this stage of their life – their time, talents, strengths – and challenges them to “this better way – a way to reach higher, dream bigger, grow stronger, love and honor God, live with more joy – and quit wasting their lives.” (pg. 8 )  While this book is aimed at teens, its message of doing hard things, and rebelling against low expectations is certainly applicable for adults as well.  “The truth is that all of us are susceptible to low expectations.  Once we have satisfied the minimum requirements, we tend to stop pushing ourselves.” (pg. 39)

The authors offer five types of hard things, “God-given opportunities powered by God-given principles that work for everybody” (pg. 57), and examples of teens around the world who have taken up this challenge:

  1. Things that are outside your comfort zone – anything that takes you outside the rut of your normal day-to-day, week-to-week activities (pg. 57)
  2. Things that go beyond what is expected or required – you aren’t content to “do not harm” – you purpose to do good. (pg. 58)
  3. Things that are too big to accomplish alone – the ability to share a passion with others and recruit them to work alongside you. (pg. 58)
  4. Things that don’t earn an immediate payoff – “…you won’t see much progress from one day to the next and because, especially at the time, it can seem like you’d be happier if you didn’t to them….We do them because they’re right, not because they have an immediate payoff.” (pg. 59)
  5. Things that challenge the cultural norm – “We have to care more about pleasing God than we do about pleasing those around us.” (pg. 59)

While it is good, and necessary, to do big hard things for God, the responsibilities and requirements of certain stages of life will limit what we can do.  In chapter 8 the authors address the issue of Small Hard Things by asking the question:

“How do we reconcile the fact that there’s a big world out there to impact for God with the fact that we’re stuck at home matching socks in yet another load of laundry?” (pg. 132)

As I said before, amazing insight for two teenage guys!  A a stay-at-home wife, and mommy of a young child, this chapter, and that question in particular, resonated with me, probably more than any other.  There are many things that I would love to be able do in the realms of ministry and education…things that can seem much more exciting, or would possibly allow me to have a greater impact on the church than scrubbing toilets and coloring pictures. 

“Small things most often occur behind the closed doors of our homes, schools, or churches.  They are rarely new or exiting, and they are often repetitive – even tedious.  Small things happen on the level at which we normally live our lives.  In fact, in the most basic sense they are our lives – the “stuff” that makes up everyday living.” (pg. 135)

Right now, it is the small things, the stuff of everyday living that God has called me to.  He has called me to model this concept of doing hard things for my daughter, even if, at times, they  may seem somewhat tedious or insignificant.  They are not.  These are the things that God has given me to do.  And, He has called me to do them for His glory (Col. 3:23, 1 Cor. 10:31).

Regardless of our age, stage of life, talents, fears, past successes or failures, that is what He has called all of us to do.  This book would be a valuable resource for anyone who works with teens on a regular basis (parents, youth pastors/wives, teachers).  But, I also think that it is a must-read for all Christians.  Teenagers are not the only ones who fall prey to low standards and expectations.  We all need to set the bar higher, and this book, written by two teenagers, will encourage you to do so.

Book Review: Damsels In Distress

Posted by Veronica on Jul 11th, 2008
2008
Jul 11

Damsels in DistressAbout a year ago, I picked up Martha Peace’s book, Damsels in Distress: Biblical Solutions for Problems Women Face.  And, I recently revisited it with my accountability group.

In her characteristic straightforward style, Martha Peace deals with several common problems and temptations that women face: Gossip, Idolatrous Emotional Attachments, Manipulation, Hurt Feelings, Vanity, PMS, Legalism, Feminism, The Role of Women in the Church, and Trials.  These can be difficult, and often emotionally-charged, issues to tackle.  In a culture – and this includes the church – that often makes excuses for, and, even defends sinful behavior, I appreciated Peace’s direct approach that calls sin what it is – sin.  She does not make excuses, but instead, as the subtitle suggests, offers biblical solutions and genuine hope for change.

You may not personally struggle with each and every issue covered in this book.  But, if you are not currently struggling with one (or more) of the issues addressed in this book, the chances are good that you may know someone who is.  And, as believers, we are called to bear one another’s burdens.  This book will serve as a practical reference as we deal with our own struggles and sinful tendencies, and also as as we seek to minister to one another. 

Although each chapter has much to offer, I will only point out two that I found particularly helpful:

Are You Sure PMS is Real?
I do not struggle with PMS in the same way that some women do.  But, I so appreciated the way Peace dealt with this issue.  Because this has never been much of an issue for me, I have a tendency to assume that most women use that time of the month as an excuse for their sinful behavior.  I have also heard others, specifically within the biblical counseling community (and this includes both men and women), claim that it is not real.  But, in this chapter (ch. 7), Peace offers both medical (the physical sympoms) and biblical (the sinful responses) evidence that point to PMS as a real issue for many women.  However, she is also careful to add,

“as real as it is, it cannot prevent us from honoring God and loving others during that time.” (pg. 105)

She then goes on to outline a biblical plan of action for dealing with the struggles and temptations presented during that time of the month.  This chapter helped me to understand the physical and emotional difficulties that some women face each month.  It also gave me greater insight as to how I can help them deal with those struggles in a biblical, Christ-honoring way.  (I actually thought that the explanation and solutions offered in this chapter were so good, I made my husband read it!)

Be Thankful? You Can’t Be Serious? (Trials)
As Christians, we all walk through trials.  We are all tested.  And, at one time or another, we have probably all asked “Why?”  I know I have.  For that reason, I also found the chapter on dealing with trials (ch. 11) to be especially helpful. 

Peace starts out this way,

“The ‘Why?’ question is common as people grapple with trials.  Although it is possible to have an innocent motive in asking the ‘Why?’ question, most people ask ‘Why?’ because they are upset with God.  Some conclude that there must not be a God.  Others believe there is a God, but He must be powerless to prevent trials.  Still others preach and teach that we have to come to the place where we forgive God.

All of these conclusions have one thing in common – they are blasphemous.  They malign God’s character by accusing Him of not being good.” (pg. 161)

Whatever the test or trail may look like, this chapter serves as a wonderful reminder that God has a purpose in testing us.  Although it may not be pleasant, and we may not ever understand the why, ultimately, we must remember that it is for our good.  And, I for one needed Peace’s gentle, but direct, reminder that, “He will do whatever it takes for you to give Him glory.” (pg. 164)

Although, and maybe because I greatly enjoyed, and profited from reading this book the first time, I was excited to share it with the ladies in my accountability group.  Discussing the topics addressed, and the study questions at the end of each chapter, with other women helped me to understand just how real some of these struggles are.  While we may not all struggle with the same temptations in the same way, we all struggle with sin. 

As Peace points out in the first chapter,

“Just because I had become a Christian did not mean that I did not have problems.  I still do, as a matter of fact!  It was an incredible relief and joy, however, to discover that God had provided resources to help me.” (pg. 25) 

This book is one of those resources!  Each chapter is filled with biblical reminders, warnings, encouragement, and hope.  I also found her charts (figures) to be an especially helpful visual aid, as she summarized sinful behaviors, and lined it up in stark contrast with what Scripture calls us to do instead.  This book begins, and ends, with the encouragement that, “there is always a biblical solution.”  

Book Review: Shopping for Time

Posted by Veronica on Mar 25th, 2008
2008
Mar 25

Shopping for TimeI recently finished the new book, Shopping for Time: How to Do It All and NOT Be Overwhelmed, by Carolyn Mahaney, Nicole Whitacre, Kristin Chesemore, and Janelle Bradshaw.  I’ve been reading their blog for a few years, and though I often find myself relating more specifically to the writing and experiences of one of the ladies more than the others, I love the unique styles, personalities, and perspectives of each one.  They are daughters, sisters, (pastor’s) wives, and mothers…In other words, they are real.  So, when I heard about this book, I was excited to read it, and learn from their combined wisdom and experience.

Regardless of the season in which you find yourself (single, newly married, mommyhood, empty nest, widowhood), these ladies realize that each one holds its own special challenges, and is full of demands on our time and energy.  And, they understand that life is busy.  But, they are able to offer wisdom and guidance through the overwhelming busyness because they view these demands (the real and the self-imposed) through the lens of Scripture.  They start out by saying,

“We can accomplish everything that God has ordained for us to do in this life….And we can do it in a peaceful, joyful manner and get sufficient rest besides.” (pg. 13)

When I first got this book, I showed it to a friend.  She looked a little skeptical as she read the title…“How to do it all? I don’t know about that.”  Probably anticipating this reaction, the authors say,

“These tips are not our attempt at Christian-coated time management principles.  Rather they are biblical, life-tested practices we trust will encourage and assist you to bring glory to the Savior through every season of your life.” (pg. 26)

Using biblical principles as their foundation, alongside the wisdom of their individual experiences, they offer 5 tips to help women apply the words of Ephesians 5:15-16, “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.”

Rise Early:  The subtitle of this chapter is “Joining the 5 a.m. Club.”  My first thought when I read that was, “Seriously?!”  But, as I read, I became convinced.  They offer this disclaimer,

“the point of this chapter is not that really godly women get up at 5 a.m.  Nowhere in the Bible will you find such a principle.  Therefore, nowhere in this book do you we make that claim.” (pg. 28). 

They also allow for the fact that “early” will look different for everyone.  So, if 5 a.m. is not biblical, then why this chapter? 

“Hands down, the most important reason to rise early is to make meeting with God a priority.  Secondarily, however, this practice has great potential to serve your family.” (pg. 34) 

Rising early, whatever that may mean, allows us to give proper time and attention to our most important priorities – our relationship with God, and our relationship and service to our families.

Sit Still:  This is the most important chapter in this book, and one of the best I read on the topic of personal devotions, or quiet times.

“We’re doers, not sitters, by nature.  We awake each morning, our minds whirling with all we want to accomplish that day.  We bound off to complete these urgent tasks.  But we must sit before we do.  In order to effectively shop for time, we must first sit – sit at Jesus’ feet.” (pg. 40) 

We are encouraged to meet with the Lord, regularly, and consistently, in order to obtain guidance, wisdom, and peace from His Word for all that we must accomplish.  Yes, life is busy.  But, before anyone begins to think that their particular circumstance merits excuse in this area, the authors offer this admonition, “Please don’t assume that because you’re a mom with young children, it’s fine for you to meet with God sporadically.  All of us…need to choose the best portion along with Mary….” (pg. 45)

Sit and Plan:  This chapter addresses the necessity of being careful how we walk (Eph. 5:15), by taking time out, and getting away, to prayerfully evaluate, and assess our priorities.  

“If we simply allow each new season to come along without charting a course, we could easily be sidetracked by urgent yet unimportant activities.  We could wear ourselves out repeating the same mistakes and dealing with the same problems over and over.  And we could potentially miss the truly significant opportunities each season has to offer.” (pg. 52) 

They offer ideas for a personal retreat in order to plan for better effectiveness in areas that may be lacking, or needing improvement.  While getting away may seem like the last thing an already-too-long to-do list will allow, “The pressures of life are, in fact, the very reason we need to sit and plan. (pg. 63)

Consider People:  God’s Word clearly shows us that, when it comes to relationships, our most important are those with our Lord, and our families.  Because these ladies have dealt with these (important) relationships in other books (and on their blog!), this chapter deals specifically with friendships – both the kind that must be cultivated and maintained, as well as those that may need to be reevaluated, and possibly removed from our lives.  They offer help in evaluating our current list of friends in light of Scripture. 

  • Do we have friends who will sharpen and mentor us?  We should. 
  • Do we regularly reach out to those in need of friendship, or salvation?  Or, would we rather stick with the familiar, even if that means making unwise choices in where, and with whom, we spend our time? 

“We must prayerfully evaluate our relational priorities in the light of God’s priorities.” (pg. 69) 

Plan to Depend:  “By consulting this tip, we can make our good intentions a reality, avoid a solution-dispensing lifestyle, and avail ourselves of God’s grace each and every day.” (pg. 80)  In this chapter, the authors suggest (or, rather, “highly recommend”) developing a daily planning system.  You will see as they share their personal planning styles, they are not suggesting a one-size-fits-all system.  But, you may find one that you can closely relate to, and use to inspire your own system. 

“While a daily planning system and smart planning will enable us to make the best use of the time in the ordinary course of daily living, we know life doesn’t always conform to our plans…So what do we do when life messes with our plans?” (pg. 85)

Whether interruptions, busyness, trials, or just the ordinary routine of everyday life, we need to depend on God each and every moment – realizing that we are completely unable to handle even the most routine tasks apart from God’s help and strength.

While some of their tips might seem a bit overwhelming (especially when you seriously consider “Joining the 5 AM Club”!!), they really are far from it.  Each one offers biblical principles, personal experience, encouragement, and a welcome sense of humor, as these godly women help their readers understand the need for implementing biblical principles into the busyness of our everyday lives.  They close with this reminder from Matthew Henry,

“It ought to be the business of every day to prepare for our last day.” (pg. 94)

Book Review: Respectable Sins

Posted by Veronica on Mar 4th, 2008
2008
Mar 4

“Sin is sin. Even those sins that I call ‘the acceptable sins of the saints’–those sins that we tolerate in our lives–are serious in God’s eyes. Our religious pride, our critical attitudes, our unkind speech about others, our impatience and anger, even our anxiety (see Philippians 4:6); all of these are serious in the sight of God.” (pg. 21)

Respectable Sins

In his new book, Respectable Sins: Confronting the Sins We Tolerate, Jerry Bridges tackles areas of sin that are often overlooked, justified, tolerated, and even accepted among Christians.  As believers, we seem to have fallen into the trap of thinking that “sin is what people outside our Christian communities do.” (pg. 16)

We can easily identify, and condemn, those areas that we would consider “big” or “serious” sins of society – blatant immorality, shady business practices, or homosexuality.  But, we fail to see our own “more acceptable” sins in the same light. 

“It is easy to let ourselves off the hook by saying that these sins are not as bad as the flagrant ones of society.  But God has not given us the authority to establish values for different sins….  The truth is, all sin is serious because all sin is a breaking of God’s law.”  (pg. 20)

In the first several chapters, Bridges lays the foundation.  He helps us understand the true nature of our sin – any sin – as unacceptable before a holy God.  While he suggests that we may feel the need to throw the book across the room, I found his blunt, but humble style anything but infuriating.  He continually offers practical suggestions for putting to death the various expressions of sin in our lives, always pointing us back to the grace and mercy of God found in the message of the Gospel, reminding us that “there is never a day in our lives when we are so ‘good’ we don’t need the gospel.” (pg. 37)

In chapters 7 through 20, Bridges addresses some of the “Respectable Sins” that believers deal with.  I was amazed at his list.  While it is not exhaustive, it certainly covers a wide range of attitudes, emotions and actions.  I have heard sermons preached on gossip, pride, and anger – some of the more obvious, but still “accepted” Christian sins.  But, there were areas addressed in this book that I had never before considered for what they really were – sin! 

Ungodliness:
Bridges begins his discussion of “acceptable sins” by addressing what he believes to be the root cause of our other sins.  No, not pride.  Ungodliness.  “We don’t think of ourselves as ungodly.  After all, we are Christians…” (pg. 53)  But, in this chapter, Bridges points out that even believers are susceptible to this sin.  (And yes, he calls it sin.)  He defines ungodliness as “living one’s everyday life with little or no thought of God, or of God’s will, or of God’s glory, or of one’s dependence on God.” (pg. 54) 

How often do we read our Bible, or pray at the start of the day, but then go on with the rest of our activities without thinking of our dependence on God, or our responsibility to Him?  If He is not a part of our thinking, how are we actively seeking to glorify Him with our actions? 

“A person may be moral and upright, or even busy in Christian service, yet have little or no desire to develop an intimate relationship wit God.  This is the mark of ungodliness.
For the godly person, God is the center and focal point of his or her life.  Every circumstance and every activity of life, whether in the temporal or spiritual realms is viewed through the lens of this God-centeredness.” (pg. 58)

Bridges offers several Scriptures to memorize, ponder, and pray over in order to help us become “more conscious of the fact that you live every moment of every day under his all-seeing eye.” (pg. 61)

Selfishness:

“Selfishness is a difficult sin to expose because it is so easy to see in someone else but so difficult to recognize in ourselves.” (pg. 102)

I have a two (almost three!) year old.  “Sharing,” or learning to do so, is an oft-repeated theme in our home these days.  But, as I read this chapter, I wondered if I spent as much time working on this concept in my own life, as I do working on it in my daughter.  I think Bridges point on this topic was especially insightful as he said,

“We can be very learned in our theology or very upright in our morality and yet fail to display the gracious qualities of Christian character that Paul called the fruit of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:22-23).” (pg. 101)

In this chapter, Bridges covers four ways that selfishness is manifest in the lives of believers: our interests, our time, our money, and the trait of inconsiderateness.  It was the last one – inconsiderateness – that really caught my attention.  I don’t know that I have ever heard someone describe “inconsiderateness” in this way before.  But, as Bridges clearly points, “Anytime we do not think about the impact of our actions on others, we are being selfishly inconsiderate.  We are thinking only of ourselves.” (pg. 105) 

He gives examples of a person who is always late and makes others wait, or a person who leaves his or her mess for others to clean.  He also includes being inconsiderate of another’s feelings – or at the very least, an indifference to them.  My husband worked as a waiter for several years, and would always comment on the rude behavior of certain customers he knew to be believers.  We need to remember that our behavior toward others, especially those who are serving us in some way (waiters, store clerks, or even family), can go a long way in brightening, or ruining someone’s day.

“Living unselfishly will likely not cost us our lives, but it will cost.  It will cost time and money.  It will cost becoming interested in the interests, concerns and needs of others.  And it will cost in learning to be considerate of the emotions and feelings of others.” (pg. 107)

Judgmentalism:
The sin of judgmentalism is one of the most subtle of our “respectable” sins because it is often practiced under the guise of being zealous for what is right.” (pg. 141)  I found this chapter to be one of the most convicting in the book.  Sadly, it is probably because it was one that I have seen demonstrated most often in my own life.  Many of the examples in this chapter were from Bridges own experiences, but I could identify with them quite closely – issues of casual or dressy “church clothes,” church music styles, temperance versus abstinence (from alcohol).  However, as he pointed out, many of these issues are based on personal preferences, which we often (wrongly) elevate to the position of biblical truth, or conviction.

“It is easy to become judgmental toward anyone whose opinions are different from ours.  And then we hide our judgmentalism under the cloak of Christian convictions.” (144)  He is not saying that we are not to address conduct that is out of line with Scripture.  When a practice is clearly condemned or prohibited by Scripture, then we are to agree with Scripture, and call it what it is – sin.  However, we must be careful to remember that we are also sinners before God. 

Under the topic of judgmentalism, Bridges also addresses the issue of having a critical spirit.  He says,

“Most of us can slip into the sin of judgmentalism from time to time.  But there are those among us who practice it continually.  These people have what I call critical spirit.  They look for and find fault with everyone and everything.  Regardless of the topic of conversation – whether it’s a person, a church, an event, or anything – they end up speaking in a disparaging manner.” (pg. 146)

And, just in case that quote is not quite convicting enough, it was his next statement that caught my attention:  “I’m not writing about theoretical people.  I’ve been with some of the, and they are not pleasant to be around.”

Guilty as charged.  I have caught myself, more often than I would care to admit, expecting a pastor, speaker, or author to say something wrong – something that I disagree with.  I have even gone to the extreme of actively, and intentionally looking for that something wrong. 

There is nothing wrong with holding strong convictions.  But, they must be held with humility, remembering Romans 14:4, “Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Lord is able to make him stand.”

Sin – especially those that we have attempted to rationalize, justify, and even accept – is not a pleasant topic.  But, “we must also face them in order to deal with them.  The worst sin of all, in practical terms, is the denial of the subtle sins in our lives.  We cannot deal with them until we admit their presence.” (pg. 178)  I cannot guarantee that you will not be tempted to throw this book out the window a time or two.  And, resisting that temptation might very well result in conviction in one, or more, of the areas Bridges addresses.  But, it will be well worth it.  Bridges offers humble, practical, and most importantly, biblical advice for facing, dealing with, and ultimately putting to death the “Respectable Sins” in our lives.  

Book Review: Choices that Lead to Godliness

Posted by Veronica on Oct 15th, 2007
2007
Oct 15

ChoicesOver the last 3 months, I have been reading Donna Morley’s book, Choices That Lead to Godliness, with my girls’ accountability group.  We read one chapter each week, and then discuss what we had read, and what we were learning.  I tend to go through books fairly quickly, so, for me, 3 months was a long time to spend in one book.  But, this book was well worth the time spent! 

Whether in the big, life-altering decisions, or the seemingly minor, everyday choices, our lives are filled with moments that call for wisdom and discernment.  In the introduction, Donna points out that,

“our choices shape us.  They determine what we are.  They shape our lives and destiny.  And we’ll discover – as the apostle Paul tells us in Philippians 1:9-10 – that when we seek to make the best choices, we do what is excellent – and pleasing to God.” (pg. 13)

Throughout the book, Donna deals directly, and biblically, with many issues that we all face as we seek to “bypass the better and choose the best” (pg. 12), and cultivate true discernment.  Each chapter is full of wisdom and biblical advice on making godly choices, but I’ll just highlight a few that I found especially helpful:

Gossip:  In the first chapter, Donna addresses an area that women, especially, tend to struggle with – our words.  She says,

“Scripture tells us the reason we are to be discerning with our words and to choose them carefully is so they will be “helpful for building other up according to their needs that it may benefit those who listen” (Eph. 4:29, NIV).  This is the beginning of godly speech.” (pg. 19) 

It is so easy to get caught up in gossipy conversations…It comes in all forms.  Sometimes, it is easy to identify, while other times it catches you completely off guard.  In this chapter, she identifies (from Scripture) three types of gossipers, and explains how we can avoid not only sharing gossip, but listening to it as well.  Even if you are not planning to share the contents of the conversation, listening to a gossip share her “tasty morsels,” without confronting the gossiper, or defending the object of the gossip is still harmful.  We would be wise to remember that “death and life are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21)

Friendships:  “Some of us seldom think seriously about the role of friendships.” (pg. 50)  But, Proverbs 12:26 tells us “The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray.” (NASB)  We need to be mindful of the impact that our friends will have on us – both for good and bad.

I tend to want all of my friendships to involve deep, spiritually-challenging conversations.  And, I become extremely disappointed when my friends “let me down” in this area.  But, Donna pointed out that, while we should be careful to choose friends who will sharpen us, and influence us toward godliness, not all friendships (even among believers) will be spiritual friendships.  They cannot all reach the same level of spiritual depth.

When we desire to further develop the spiritual side of a particular friendship, we first need to honestly examine our own lives to determine if we are ready to offer that type of friendship.  I love her directness, as she reminds us that, “One thing that can keep us from sharpening one another in the Lord is ungodliness (though we may think we are godly).” (pg. 57, emphasis added)  Consider these helpful questions from this chapter:

  • Am I a woman of the word? (Do I daily study God’s Word, and trust the Holy Spirit to lead me?)
  • Am I a woman of habitual prayer?  Only a woman who knows God through prayer can be near to the heart and mind of God.
  • Is my life hidden in Christ?  (Do I know that my life is nothing without God, and that He can work through me to be a blessing in the lives of others?) (pg. 57)

Using The Time of Your Life:  “Life, minute by minute, goes by only once, and I have learned only too well that when I misspend time, I can never get it back.” (pg. 97)  I like schedules and routines.  I have always classified myself as a “task-oriented” person.  I want to be efficient and diligent in all that I have to do in a given day.  And, while being diligent in my work is not necessarily a bad thing, I often find myself getting frustrated with “interruptions” that may potentially mess up my plans.  The sad part about that is that these apparent “interruptions” may come in the form of people who need my attention (my husband, or my daughter, possibly?).Donna pointed out that,

“there are two types of interruptions.  One distracts us from what we should be doing; the other delays us, merely postponing our progress.  Distractions jeopardize our chance to reach our goal, while delays merely grant us unexpected opportunities.” (pg. 102)

I love the perspective that she offers in that statement, and throughout the chapter.  On a practical level, she suggests making extra room in your schedule to allow for these “opportunities.”  She also suggests thinking through your priorities, and planning for ways to effectively use our time, and ensure that we are using it wisely to influence others.  If my husband is a priority, I will incorporate that into my daily schedule, by planning ahead for his arrival home – by making time to pick up the toys and other “stuff” that collects throughout the day, and planning for, and preparing, dinner.  If my daughter is a priority, that will be reflected in the time that I purpose to spend with her, both in play and in instruction – both for the present, and with an eye to her future.

“We have no idea what is in store when we see delays as opportunities rather than distractions!” (pg. 107)

God’s Word:  The last two chapters of the book focus on God’s Word.  Chapter 12 deals specifically with “Blunting the Sword,” while chapter 13 focuses on the question of “God’s Word or Ours?”  While each chapter offered valuable (biblical) wisdom, and principles for cultivating discernment, I found these two chapters especially helpful and encouraging.

“Widespread lack of discernment not only allows distortion of the Word to go unchallenged, but it also lets these erroneous teachings pass for “insight.”  A person can listen to message after message without ever hearing basic truths or having to change ungodly attitudes.  During some lessons today, the Bible sits uselessly on the listeners’s lap, unopened.” (pg. 198)

Unfortunately, I have lost count of the number of times this has happened to me at various church-sponsored events. We have become a culture that elevates skilled communicators, funny stories, or secular human philosophies above the truth and absolute authority of Scripture.

But, this is not exclusive to the church, or church-related activities.  In chapter 13, Donna brings this problem to a personal level – our own personal study of God’s Word.

“Are we reading Scripture as God wrote it, or are we distorting it and communicating error?  Are we turning God’s Word into our word?” (pg. 212)

We need to be careful and diligent in our study God’s Word.  We need to see it for what it truly is – the inspired, infallible, inerrant Word of God, and seek out an accurate understanding of what is written.  Only then can we correctly apply it to our lives, and gain the discernment that will allow us to make wise choices that will please and honor our Lord.

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Yesterday (Sunday), Donna was kind enough to spend the afternoon with our girls’ group, and answer many questions.  Some were pulled directly from the content of this book, while others were “inspired by” it.  Her knowledge and understanding of God’s Word was clearly demonstrated, as each of her answers pointed us back to the truths of Scripture.  She truly is a wise woman, and lives out what she has written in this book.  It is a privilege to know her, and has been a blessing to learn from her wisdom – both through this book, and in person. 

 

 

Book Review: Precious In His Sight

Posted by Veronica on Aug 2nd, 2007
2007
Aug 2

“God’s will for your life and mine is found in 1 Peter 3:4.  We are to do whatever is necessary to cultivate ‘the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable quality of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God’ (NASB).”  (pg. 9)

Precious in His SightSo begins Pat Ennis’ book, Precious in His Sight: The Fine Art of Becoming a Godly Woman.  I originally picked up this book because I very much enjoyed and benefited from the practical, biblical encouragement in her two previous books (co-authored with Lisa Tatlock).  This book contains the same gentle, but straightforward style of biblical exhortation, as she encourages women to “spend time in your heavenly Father’s company, cultivating character qualities that contribute to the development of a gentle and quiet spirit.” (pg. 9)  Dr. Ennis addresses topics common to all women – spiritual life, relationships, and emotions.  Though the pursuit and cultivation of this type of character is a life-long endeavor, this book is definitely a good place to start. 

The Godly Woman and Her Spiritual Life:
Dr. Ennis begins by addressing the principle of spiritual vitality in the life of a godly woman.  She shares, from Scripture, principles and habits that need to be part of our everyday lives if we are to be adequately prepared for unforeseen circumstances that may come into our spiritual lives.  The very first principle listed is an example of her refreshingly honest, direct style, as she points out,

“Ultimately, I have only two choices in life: obedience or rebellion to my heavenly Father’s instructions.” (pg. 28) 

She then goes on to address the importance of reading, memorizing, meditating on, and applying God’s Word on a daily basis.

“The more I internalize God’s Word, the more its contents will influence my daily life. (Psalm 1:2-3)” (pg. 28)

Chapter 6 was one of my favorites, as it dealt with the topic of modesty.  She poses a difficult question: “Will you choose modesty or fashion?” (pg. 47)  She explains that these two are not necessarily mutually exclusive, but there are times when a choice must be made.  This chapter challenges women to reflect biblical standards of modesty and beauty in their clothing choices and in their character. 

1 Timothy2:9-10 “likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.” (ESV)

Dr. Ennis clearly addresses the question of whether biblical standards for modesty are obsolete in the world of twenty-first century fashion by saying,

“…the immutability (changelessness) of God would be in question if the Scriptures that provide you with a standard for dress are not timelessly relevant.  If you think that God changed His mind about one passage of Scripture, how can you be sure that He has not changed His mind about others?” (pg. 48)

The Godly Woman and Her Relationships:
In this section of the book, Dr. Ennis describes several types of relationships that are necessary and beneficial to our spiritual growth.  Though the chapters on the mentoring relationship, spiritual (and physical) mothering, and honoring fathers are full of biblical wisdom, it was the chapters on friendship that stood out to me.

Chapter 15 points out our need for friendship and companionship.  Dr. Ennis offers a list of 18 different passages of Scripture that reveal the impact that true friends can have on one another.  However she closes her chapter by asking why, in light of the physical, emotional, and spiritual benefits of female friendships, we find it so difficult to carve out the needed time to develop these relationships.  She ends this chapter with a “Point to Ponder” that reminds us that “Precious in His sight is the woman who acknowledges that she needs to cultivate female friendships.”  (pg. 105)

In the chapters that follow, she addresses characteristics of the various phases of friendship, from getting to know one another, to an enduring, committed friendship that stands the tests of time, emotions, and circumstances.  She offers biblical solutions for identifying, and then eradicating common problems that arise over the course of a friendship.  She also urges women to carefully examine themselves, and evaluate the type of friendship they offer to others.  Each evaluation question is taken from Scripture, and she offers practical suggestions for taking these passages and questions to a deeper level of Bible study and self-examination.

The Godly Woman and Her Emotions:
Dealing with, or controlling emotions is a problem that most women face at one time or another.  The last section of this book deals with some very common emotions – stress, worry, discouragement, fear, and forgiveness – and the issues that may arise if these are not dealt with in a biblical manner.  I found the chapters on stress (planning, organizing, and prioritizing) and discouragement particularly helpful.

In chapter 20, Dr. Ennis begins by asking, “Do you ever feel like the hurrier you go, the behinder you get?” (pg. 135)  I consider myself to be somewhat organized.  But, I had to laugh when I read that, because that describes my daily routine all too well!  In this chapter, Dr. Ennis offers several practical suggestions for managing our time, and God-given assets wisely.  She reminds us that,

“A Christian’s priorities should reflect an eternal perspective and follow the model of the Lord, who glorified His Father while he was on earth by finishing the work His Father gave Him to do (John 17:4).” (pg. 136)

Chapter 22 deals with the topic of discouragement.  This is probably not an unfamiliar emotion to anyone, but it must be dealt with correctly to avoid the trap of self-pity.  In this great description, Dr. Ennis explains where discouragement comes from, and calls it what it often is – sin.

“Discouragement’s roots are planted in the soil of idealistic expectations, such as holding perfectionist standards for yourself and others, embracing impractical outcomes for the institutions you are associated with, and anticipating unrealistic benefits from work, leisure time, education, or marriage.  The greater the discrepancy between hope and fulfillment, the greater the potential for discouragement.  In many instances the emotion of discouragement is actually anger without enthusiasm.  Anger for selfish reasons is sin.” (pgs. 147-148)

Using the life of Elijah, the cycle of discouragement is clearly illustrated in, what she calls, the “Elijah Effect.”  She then offers biblical principles that can be applied to put an end to this cycle, and cause us to exhibit true contentment, regardless of our circumstances.

Conclusion:
At the conclusion of each chapter, Dr. Ennis offers several opportunities for further study, as we pursue this gentle and quiet spirit.  She also offers practical tips for, not just study of this book, but personal devotions (quiet times) in general.  Her suggestions for character studies throughout Scripture, personal plans of action for “putting off” sinful behavior, and verses/passages to memorize and meditate on are all extremely useful tools in this pursuit.  This would be a wonderful resource for any woman who truly desires to be “Precious in His Sight.”

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“…but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” 1 Peter 3:4 (ESV)
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